Two wrongs do make a right

Hello, hello, hello.

As you've all been aware by now, all Siber Party of Malaysia (M) candidates were returned unopposed in their respective constituencies. We are thrilled at having increased our representation by 500%. You'll now see YBB Dek Mat, YBB Mat Merah, YBB Tatak Sombong and me joining our Chief Whip YBB Minah Black in Parliament. That girl needs company, if you know what I mean.

While we're absolutely ecstatic at the party's showing this time around, we think that it would have been better to actually have to compete just to allow our constituents to exercise their constitutional right to pangkah the ballot paper. Quite obviously, due to us being uncontested, our constituents were denied their time-off from work to mengundi for us. That's 4 hours of productivity they could not skivvy off from. What a waste !

Moving forward though, we think that though we are all parliamentarians now, we still owe it to our constituents and the people of Malaysia to tell them what we stand for. Hence the release of our manifesto, The Power of 4G.

We now think that why bother just stopping at denying the 2/3 majority, after all, what can we do without the mandate to govern the nation ? So as our Chief Whip announced yesterday, we are going for broke and standing in the other seats we have yet to secure. Like we told our good friend Hafiz, we reaffirm our stand that bloggers shouldnt be elected just because they are bloggers, but because they will make good parliamentarians and stand for something their constituents believe in.

And unlike Jeff Ooi, we will not ask to ban race based parties either. After all, wouldn't doing that be tantamount to eroding the rights of freedom of association ? If birds of a feather want to flock together, then let them by all means. You'll just get a lot of noise and a lot of avian doodoo falling from the trees.

So, I am proud to unveil our electoral poster and the party symbol in the coming March 8th elections. We've decided to keep it simple, and done away with complex symbols. Going black and white will ease our financial burden during campaigning, for not all of us are able to raise RM113,000 through donations from birds of a feather. We'll only be raising funds through Mydeen's mamak shop, where RM0.10 from every teh tarik purchased will go towards SiPM campaign funds. While Mydeen does sell a lot of teh tariks, that still won't be enough for a full fledged publicity campaign.

So, without much fanfare, do allow us to unveil our party symbol, the humble X. Just turning up at the polling booth and placing an X on the ballot paper would be a vote for the Siber Party of Malaysia (M).



A simple X, that's all it takes to let us know that you want us. Remember, you the people, have got the power.

Petrolhead populism

Sometimes, its the little things that count notwithstanding the weightage one puts to it.

And so, after perusing through the manifestos of most if not all the political parties, particularly the DAP and PKR, we get a feeling that its nothing more than petrolhead populism. At least the promise to cut toll charges and pump prices.

You know, we actually won't mind that. But its empty promises because in the same breath, they say deny the ruling coalition the two-thirds majority. Guess they are actually looking at incremental change.

We think otherwise.

We propose to increase pump prices for all fossil fuels except natural or compressed natural gas used in all modes of transport. Fact is, we would even give incentives for hybrid or electric-powered vehicles.

Current emission levels in Malaysia is already turning our pristine blue skies grey at certain times of the year, although some of it can be attributed to neighbouring nations. The fact remains, we need to cut down emission levels to enhance air quality and delay climate change.

And we would like to maintain toll charges at current levels. As it is, the lattice-work of highways criss-crossing the country has encouraged a growth in the number of cars on the road. We need to reduce that, to reduce emission levels and even road accidents.

Instead, we propose to use savings from the lack of subsidies to finance better public and goods transport using clean and green energy where possible. The other parties can talk about preserving the environment but we haven't seen any plans yet.

Planting flags, stringing buntings and pasting posters won't help. We need vision. We need action.

Those who want short-term gains, like cheap fuel and toll charges, are like the same politicians who want a short-cut to power for their own ends and not for the interest of the public and future generations.

Think about it. And vote the Siber Party of Malaysia (M) if you want more than just cheap fuel, cheap tolls and cheap talk.

SiPM Manifesto: The Power of 4G

Heyy babes!

Things are looking super duper for the Siber Party of Malaysia (M) as we have won all our parliamentary seats uncontested!!! Awesome!

So I wanna like say congratulations and felicitations to SiPM's four new parliamentarians: Yang Bukan Blogger (YBB) Dek Mat of Kencing Setan (P.666), YBB Tatak Sombong of Sungei Wang (P.888), YBB Mat Merah of File Not Found (P.404) and YBB Mydeen Aboo Backer of Mamak Maju (P.786).

And of course congratulations and felicitations to me too for successfully defending my seat. Like duhh!

And more good news!

We are like absolutely ecstatic with the results and we have decided to like to go allll the way and contest in all Parliament Seats.

And of course all you guys and gals out there will want to know hey what else right?

Unlike the other parties in Malaysia, SiPM is soo committed to lead Malaysia into new heights, and depriving Barisan Nasional their 2/3 majority will result in no change, like come on! How can you make changes in Parliament if the opposition has less than 2/3?? Its like, got to be total, man! Now wouldn't that be totally rad!

Denying BN the 2/3 majority would like preserve the status quo in Parliament - nothing would move and all would be bogged down with politicking and not the business of running the country.

Fact is, Status quo should just remain a band from the 70s.

Oh.My.God! Why couldn't they think of this?

Anyway getting on with our program for the day, here's our tripendicular Manifesto, folks!

LEGALISE THE POWER OF 4G - SiPM'S MANIFESTO FOR THE 12TH MALAYSIA GENERAL ELECTION

1. Legalise IT: Parties of all kinds - political and festive, sexual and tupperware!
   
2. Legalise IT: Marijuana. We may not be able to stop the rise in fuel or food prices. But we sure can make you laugh about it!
   
3. Legalise IT: Carnal Knowledge. How else can we create truly united Malaysians, without knowing how to do it right and like of course with pleasure! ;)
4. Legalise IT: Football Pools. If we can't win with our national team let's just bet on the sport! With rising prices, this is another way for you to score some C-notes!

LEGALISE IT: The power of 4G.

"PARTI.HISAP.MAIN.JUDI. UNDILAH SIPM (M)!"

Now you know our manifesto, all that remains is to inform you of our party logo and how to vote for us at the ballot boxes. But that's for my boys to like tell you guys and gals...

So that's all from me tonight! Someone gag me already! Teeheee!

Remember! PARTI! HISAP! MAIN! JUDI! How G is that?